{"id":6368,"date":"2018-06-21T09:30:20","date_gmt":"2018-06-21T13:30:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/elbowglitter.com\/blog\/?p=6368"},"modified":"2018-06-21T08:50:49","modified_gmt":"2018-06-21T12:50:49","slug":"reach-in","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/elbowglitter.com\/blog\/2018\/06\/21\/reach-in\/","title":{"rendered":"Reach In"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/a>
jplenio<\/a> \/ Pixabay<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

With the recent tragic suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, there have been a lot of things written online suggesting resources for people who are struggling with depression.\u00a0 Lots of phone numbers of places to go for help, lots of people saying “Hey, if you’re in a dark place, contact me.”<\/p>\n

And this is all great information.\u00a0 But you need to also look at the words coming from the people who have been in those dark places.\u00a0 When someone is so depressed that they are considering suicide, they don’t think they have value.\u00a0 They don’t think they will be missed.\u00a0 They think that others will be better off without them.\u00a0 We all know that is so very wrong, but their disease is lying to them.\u00a0 And so they aren’t going to reach out for help.<\/p>\n

Instead, we have to make a point to reach in<\/em>.<\/p>\n

I’m lucky in that I have struggled with anxiety and probably some mild depression over the years, but I have never been suicidal.\u00a0 But I have friends who have been and friends who have been in some pretty dark places.\u00a0 And you know what?\u00a0 I didn’t reach in.\u00a0 I don’t know what I was thinking.\u00a0 Maybe I thought they needed time alone, maybe I was too wrapped up in my own life to notice that someone needed help.\u00a0 Wherever I was, I wasn’t there for them.<\/p>\n

Now, I’m not trying to say that anyone is at fault for suicide.\u00a0 Suicide is entirely the fault of depression.\u00a0 It’s a vicious disease.\u00a0 We would never judge someone for dying from cancer.\u00a0 We would never judge someone for getting medical help for cancer.\u00a0 Depression should be treated no differently.\u00a0 The problem is that one of the effects of depression can be the intense need to hide away, preventing the afflicted from getting help.<\/p>\n

So if you have a friend who is struggling, or who you haven’t heard from in a while, or who you’re just a little worried about, check in on them.\u00a0 And depending on the situation, maybe don’t take no for an answer.<\/p>\n

There is a wonderful Twitter thread circulating about a woman struggling with severe depression following the death of her father.\u00a0 She moved to a new apartment and had been unable to muster the energy to unpack (another effect of depression) so her friends simply showed up and setup her home for her.\u00a0 They didn’t ask, they just went into action.\u00a0 Sure, this was a risk.\u00a0 The woman could have gotten angry.\u00a0 But it was a worthwhile risk.\u00a0 It showed her that she was important, that she was loved, and it created a safe, comfortable space for her to live in as she fought with her depression.<\/p>\n

I’m not saying that you should just invade a friend’s space, but if there is someone you’re worried about and inviting them out isn’t working, try showing up with food and a movie.\u00a0 Worst case, they close the door in your face.\u00a0 Not the end of the world.\u00a0 Maybe they aren’t up for seeing you, but at least you brought them something to eat.\u00a0 But maybe they will let you in and sit down with you for a meal.\u00a0 Even if you just watch the movie and don’t talk, you’re showing that friend that you’re there.\u00a0 If you’re far away, just keep trying to get in contact.\u00a0 Send texts, send emails, send a care package.\u00a0 Do whatever you can.\u00a0 Because while depression is a disease and is often best treated by medication and therapy, friendship and caring can also make a difference.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

With the recent tragic suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, there have been a lot of things written online suggesting resources for people who are struggling with depression.\u00a0 Lots of phone numbers of places to go for help, lots of people saying “Hey, if you’re in a dark place, contact me.” And this is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[169],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\nReach In - 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